Vulnerability unlocks the door to leadership power

Dear Readers,

As this is my very first blog I'm going to keep it fairly short and sweet.

For those of you who have faithfully followed my somewhat erratic newsletters over the last few years, this blog is my attempt to 'step up' to a more modern way of communicating and, more importantly, share my thoughts, insights and discoveries about leadership in a more frequent and informal way.

My most recent insight into leadership came during a six hour lunch conversation with a client who also happens to be a terrific leader (at least, he is becoming one). He was relating a personal story to me about a recent medical crisis with his infant son. The situation called for my client, his wife and two sons to travel abroad in search of specialist medical assistance. To his concern, the destination was a country he has been, at best, ambivalent towards for many years.

To cut a long story (six hours) short, my client explained how every single person he encountered, from a petrol pump attendant, to the consultant physician who operated on his child, to the police officer who stopped him in the middle of the night for driving without his lights on was amazingly helpful, supportive and sympathetic with him and his situation. In fact, my client described how his interactions had a quality and a power he had never experienced before, ever.

I asked him whether he thought this was due to the innate characteristics of the people in this particular country, or to his state of mind at the time. And, if it was his state of mind, what was it about the way he connected with people that evoked such a response?

After considering this question for a minute or so, my client had an insight that I wish to share. It dawned on him that what he had revealed every time he connected with another human being, was his vulnerability. Caught in an emotionally draining personal drama, he was no longer the successful, powerful corporate executive. Instead he was a choked-up, desperate father of a child in need of urgent specialist care. It was his vulnerability - not his intellect - that triggered an immediate response whenever he asked. It was his vulnerability - not his wealth and status - that moved people to help and support him.

Two days ago, whilst sitting on a plane I read an article that brought this principle into a business perspective. It is in the February 22 edition of Business Week, and the article, entitled 'The Power of Saying We Blew It' (the regular 'Outside Shot' feature, by Patrick Lencioni). In it, Lencioni describes the new TV ads for Domino's Pizza in which the President J. Patrick Doyle acknowledges all the failings customers find with his pizzas! Having 'fessed-up he then lists all of the things Domino's is doing to address customers' concerns.

Lencioni says, "I'm willing to bet that Domino's will sell a lot more pizzas in the months ahead. And the reason I believe that has less to do with the new ingredients than with Domino's willingness to cross a line that most companies - won't even approach. Domino's chose to make itself vulnerable."

He goes on to explain that "Vulnberability isn't a word that shows up on lists of ingredients for business success. Here's why it should: Without the willingness and ability to be vulnerable, we simply can't build deep and lasting relationships in business and, come to think of it, life. Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness; it's actually a sign of strength. People whe are genuinely open and transparent prove that they have the confidence and self-esteem to allow others to see them as they really are, warts and all. There's something magnetic about people who do that."

Let me leave you with the questions: What would it be like to show your vulnerability at work? How might it move the people in your professional world? What would you need to change in order to do that?

Check out this clip at Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AH5R56jILag&feature=related